Back When I Was Four - Jeffrey Lewis
back when I was four
and I knew the name of every dinosaur
I knew how to read rom comic books
my baby sitter said I was really smart
when the lights went out
everything changed
and the radio music made me feel strange
and I had a real bad dream about a gorilla in the bathroom
and back when I was six
I took everything real serious
I thought every song that came on the radio
was referring to strange sexual acts
because they thought I wouldn't know the facts
and being small is hard I know
and no one tells you how
and back when I was eight
I would sit outside on an old mill crate
and look out at the world from the stoop across the street
the boom boxes and the hot concrete
and every Halloween they hung a million rubber skeletons across ninth street
and back when I was twelve or so
I swear to god I've never felt so low
everyone but me was making out and eating cookies
I had more than my brain could stand
I threw my life in a garbage can
I felt so weird I had to disappear
in crying suicide disease
and at fifteen getting stoned felt good
and it sent me back to childhood
and nothing ever mattered to me more than that
but then sixteen became eclipse
my brain became apocalypse
I was lost and found and I never been the same
and back when I was twenty two
I left the best thing that I knew
and I gave it all up for fortune and for fame
I played like I didn't know how
I shocked the world I wowed the crowd
but I deserved more than what they gave
and back when I was twenty seven
still nothing had been forgiven
clay turns into rock and rock just sits
so sitting on a crowded beach
I would pretend I was a leech
and I'd stick to thing here and there for a little bit
and back when I was thirty one
I knew I'd become what I'd become
nothing left to reveal and there was nowhere left to turn
so shocked and withered
dumb and bitter and in need of a baby sitter
I'd gladly let my hand fall off and burn, burn, burn
back when I turned the big four-O
I realized how much there was to go
and I figured being alone forever wasn't where it was at
so I took my head out of the window and taught myself how to love real fast
I started talking about painting with the woman in the laundromat
and back when I was fifty
and my first wife had just left me
I felt okay and I sang my daughter funny little songs
and just when I thought the best was past
I fell in love for real at last
and it didn't even matter that it had taken me so long
and back when I was sixty three
the public rediscovered me
all my comic books and albums had all become rare cult collectors items
and both my parents were diciest
so I didn't see my records get re-released
and I got a dog for the first time in my life
and back when I was seventy four
my dog died and I got two more
I still felt really good about my daughter and also my girlfriend
and I would sing and draw a little bit
but mostly I would wake up early and sit
and hang out with the puppies and wish that I could live forever
and back when I was eighty seven and my grandson had just turned eleven
my woman was dead and my dogs were getting pretty old
my body didn't work quiet like it should
but overall things were pretty good
I was getting decent royalties from the reissued comic books and records
and back when I was
one hundred and six
my only friend
was one goldfish
everyone I ever knew was dead and gone
and the goldfish never had a name
and the neighbors thought
I was insane
and I flushed it down the toilet when I saw it floating upside down
and back when I was one hundred and twenty eight
I'd sit outside on an old mill crate
and look out at the world from the stoop across the street
the boom boxes and the hot concrete
and every Halloween they hung
a million rubber skeletons across ninth street
and every Halloween they hung
a million rubber skeletons
every Halloween they hung
a million rubber skeletons
every Halloween they hung
a million rubber skeletons
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